Agnes (name change) was dressed in drab brown full length tweeds
with faded dark blond hair which was straggly and unkempt. She had pale skin
which had an unhealthy look about it and had black under her eyes and puffy eye
bags as well. She spoke in a tremulous voice and kept rubbing her hands
together.
I
was the only therapist available and she reluctantly chose to go with me to the
consulting room. She kept her heavy coat
on and it smelt of mothballs and dampness.
She said she was desperate and at the end of her tether, she had prayed
and was a sort of Christian, she came to St. James as it was a church with a
therapeutic ministry. I said that not all the therapists and healers were
Christians but we believed in compassion and an Intelligence in the Universe
named God and other names. She agreed this was what she wanted and was glad
that it was all embracing as she had enough of preaching and abuse.
I
said if the abuse was physical I would suggest she went to the police or social
services. She said no, it was verbal, psychological and mental harassment.
I
asked her if she would care to share with me the harassment. She said it was her husband he was a well
known academic, he would not have children and felt emotion was stupid a waste
of energy and an unnecessary indulgence. He monitored her reading material and
media activities. She was a qualified University Historian and he a well known
Paleontologist.
They
did not make love, it was more like mutual masturbation and he hated it, he
never kissed her or comforted her, he had changed from their University
romance, especially when he got his doctorate, he felt it was unfitting for a
Professor or Doctor to be ‘victim of the emotions’.
I
said I would like to explore your trapped emotions by using creative imagery,
drawing and relaxation through breathing. She thought this unbelievable crude
and left the room.
Two
weeks later she returned, looking even more frail and wan. She had researched these techniques and would
like to try even though she was not thoroughly convinced.
The
first imagery was amazing. Sitting on a
wall was a character like Humpty Dumpty and he looked sorrowful and he
resembled her. I asked whether it made sense if I suggested she got off the
wall and did something about her situation, she looked animated and said yes.
We explored this over the next couple of sessions.
The
came a big breakthrough on about session seven we did another imagery I felt
she would see a fruit without juice, I sometimes could feel these things, she
saw a grape squeezed dry and when she shared, she told me this. I suggested she
was squeezed emotionally dry by her husband and if she went on like this she
could get seriously ill. She said her
doctor thought she was going in the direction of leukemia. Her husband was
draining the life out her, a sort of slow death.
When
she saw this from the grape we discussed ways of reinventing and energizing
her.
A
few sessions later as I arrived at the clinic the receptionist said to me’ look
over there’. Sitting in the corner was a
stunning blond with fishnet stockings, high heel shoes, a mini skirt and
dazzling make up. The blond got up and
walked towards me and she said ‘Hi Geoff’. I was stunned, it was Agnes.
This
is what she did; she walked next door to Simpsons and bought a negligee for
nightwear, suspenders and sexy briefs and some make up, and an assistant helped
her put it on, she then went home put on the nightwear and suspenders then went
into her husbands study, apparently he looked startled and aghast and said
‘have you lost your mind, get out, you look absurd’ she beckoned a sexy finger
at him and said ‘Come on big Boy show me what you got’. He asked where have you got these ideas from,
she said she had been to therapy, he said I will sort this therapist out, he
never did.
He
freaked out and kicked out of the house, she rented a small room and left him
and was getting a divorce. She asked me
to wait for her after my sessions with other clients and she wanted and even
begged me to have a glass of wine with her and a snack. We went into a wine bar I had a small glass
of wine as she told me the story as above.
She thanked me for my patience and work with her. I told her she had the images and she had
this inner something and it will always be there. I thanked her for her kind words.
We
went outside after the drink and snack, she kissed me on my eyes and cheeks and
hugged me and I kissed her cheeks and had a long hug.
She
went away to the tube station and I to my longish walk to where my car was
parked. I never saw her again until one
day turning on the radio I heard her being interviewed over her latest book on
History.
SHACK
Agnes gave me permission to tell her story(Shack)
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