SHACK 246 IT'S OK

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I was working at a Police Station in the West End of London just behind Marble Arch and the Cumberland Hotel.  We had a visitor there one day the late great Michael Jackson. I had the privilege (long story I have blogged elsewhere) and when he had finished his wonderful voluntary performance it left me in tears and he came up to me as I touched his greasy hair and looked me in the eyes and said ‘It’s gonna be alright’ He then signed twelve or so autographs for me.  His eyes were the eyes of a child and they were lovely and I felt uplifted and I felt he knew the pain which I had at that time which made me cry as he sang ‘One day in your Life’.

One might wonder what this has to do with this writing. Its strange how something’s that apparently seem mundane and trivial can affect one so.  I was hurting real bad and felt betrayed, alone and vilified and yet Michael in that moment and the music lifted me and it led me onto and back into my meditations and practices and this came from it.

It’s Ok not to think, have no form and have no former self, I don’t feel naked without thought, where is there, less is OK, its OK to have no description, I came back to the identity of oneself as the battering I took made me question all this.

Then when I had further breakthroughs in the mental and psychological war as it seemed I came to an understanding as it was then ‘yes Michael its gonna be alright’; the understanding was about the personal ‘MY’ as in the ego, the physical psyche as it is formed from the past and if held rigidly say with a few giveaway’s and minor shifts becomes my reality and my future in perpetuation.  These are only shifting sands, the dunes of my mind construct and are fragile and can be changed and shifted by the winds of time and change.

Today’s climate sees the populace clinging to what may seem a safe passage during the storms of wars and ravage and political with economic instability.

None will last but many will perish to make their ship the only survivor.  Many face the peril of nowhere to go and panic and despair set in and vainly ask where is there safety, and there is a spiritual equivalent when one faces the fact that were are at best a bunch of thoughts and like the dunes are temporary, expedient and transient.  What happens when thoughts, familiar and strange no longer serve one, where does one go then, there seems no refuge. Then the leap into the unknown.

There is no future from the past if we project a future from the past we are merely living the past as the future and if there is no future for the past cannot be altered only to be not there and no alternative ‘ideas from the past modified to make a seemingly new future’ for this is a makeover, a variation on a theme.

So it is only thought and subtle habit that makes one aware of this and is this really me. Is it possible to live without thought, or the very minimum to get by?  Does the habit of ‘I know that I know that I know’ be the only foundation and rock of reality in this Life.  What about ‘I know that I don’t know but when I need to know I will know’.

When all thought has subsided and it can naturally without force by gentle alert unbiased observation and one finds that thought-less-ness is not a blank vegetative boring imbecilic senile mumbling dotard or an alcoholic drug distracted mind lost in a reverie of ‘what might have been’ once one can feel this ‘gap’ this space between thoughts one is somewhere else, in fact one has no personality or character and yet is a something out of nothing from nowhere.

SHACK