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| Happee Mindz |
'Ah Lord God! behold thou hast made the heaven and the Earth by thy great Power and stretched out arm and there is nothing too hard for thee' Jeremiah 32.17
This was todays reading from my old friend God Calling calendar which I have had for about goodness knows when, it shows the date, reading and not the year. Today was 04/02/2022 a Friday.
I have a split belief; Intellectually and hopefully sinking into deeper consciousness to intuition and deep spiritual meaning AND feeling. I know that from visual, reading about the Universe, science and all that I truly feel there is a Almighty intellect and intelligence beyond the THE BIG BANG and accident. I know and appreciate the opinion that I am so brain washed, inculcated and entrenched in this belief that it is all that it is.
Well I have pondered, ruminated and contemplated this as above and perhaps my feeling is a deep brain washing but I really do feel that there is the Great Spirit, God, The Source or whatever name one feels to call the Creator. As to this day it feels unshakeable.
However this is the split and it saddens me and perhaps the reason that I am still alive although not knowing what I am now here for as I am 83 yrs of age more or less a recluse not in good mental or bodily health after two years of madness during a so called Pandemic which now it seems has been an attempted takeover by an elite set, the cabal as I call it for their own purposes and agenda this can be found in thirty or forty blogs in www.geofffreed.com (online) which is my other site and another www.geoffreedarchives.blogspot.com.
Intellectually and logically I know and accept and believe that there is a God, a stand alone Almighty Mother / Father God Creator and YET I still lack 100% unmitigated trust and soon as a deep stressing challenge arises mainly over my health and body, I crumble and go back to fear, anxiety and coping mechanisms. So my trust and belief does not match my intellectual and logical assumptions. My faith is not as strong as my assumptions and logical mental beliefs.
There is a split between faith 100% and praying and beseeching. At this time I am ashamed because I have had many moments when I was able to go quiet and go beyond the anxiousness and definite miracles came as it were, I have had amazing synchronicities and yet I can fall by the wayside as it were.
God made the Universe and all forms in it and I one of Gods children / creation and if as Jeremiah say 'NOTHING IS TOO HARD FOR THEE' then why must I mistrust and not have willingly surrendered faith?
I feel God did not create me to suffer and be at mercy of the worldly materialistic hard way of life or is having a downer on me as a sinner and me promising to do better and then faltering. It's not God fault and I know God always forgives because when I quieten down or am full of remorse the quiet mind of reassurance can ensue. However I tend to beat myself up and it is NOT GOD punishing me for my iniquities it is my own programming that attracted these iniquities and I do not like the burden of the ego automatically being triggered by a lustful site, a felonious event or some such thing. My will is either numbed or weak in many temptations, however are these so named felonious acts immoral or ungodly or have I been seduced and inculcated to believe a moral, religious, pious code that maybe not a sin or iniquitous?
So it comes back in my view to the quiet mind and awareness and '
Prov.3 Verses 5 to 6
[5] Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
[6] In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
'Be still and know God within thee.' To me this says the same as in Buddhism and Eastern Philosophy.
Śūnyatā
Description
Śūnyatā pronounced in English as, translated most often as emptiness, vacuity, and sometimes voidness, is a Buddhist concept which has multiple meanings depending on its doctrinal context. It is either an ontological feature of reality, a meditative state, or a phenomenological analysis of experience.
WikipediaPali: Suññatā; (Dev: सुञ्ञता) Tibetan: སྟོང་པ་ཉིད་; (Wylie: stong-pa nyid; THL: tongpa nyi) It is not vacant it means to me when the mind is still in meditation there is a calm tranquil feeling with almost and sometimes complete absence of thought and it feels as if me as Geoff has gone there is an awareness which has no definition of name and YET I know is me without character or personality, it is non personal or impersonal Being Of Awareness.
I suppose the intrusion of thought and agenda interrupts the peace and annoys me and irks the calm, the ego wants domination and not calm it knows its alive by the agendas of brainwashing stored and this is its creator and code. This then is my great lesson; to be aware naturally which we all are but not recognising the witness which is the awareness watching all the time even in sleep and coma, but being captivated by the graphics outside as it were. Like when one is captivated by the TV and then becomes detached and still watching one acknowledges the graphics but is not emotionally involved and yet there is still a sense of understanding and appreciation somehow at a different level of conscious awareness.
SHACK
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