Propped up on one arm looking down at the face of an angel I knew I had to go. The tears came to my eyes and my heart felt as if were cleaved asunder.
I could not bear to wake you and face you. So I left silently hoping and praying you would not awaken
Down the road I had second, third and hundreds of regrets and torments I had to go back and face my beautiful lovely angel. She was at the door looking for me and she knew I was restless and would leave.
She came running towards me her hair flowing behind her and her wonderful eyes searing into my soul. I lamented as I held to me, her silent sobbing burning my soul, roasting it in the barbecue of her love.
I wrestled with the urge to run away and I knew I would never forgive myself for leaving or for staying, and for hurting her with my unrest and anxiety.
She said she understood me and that there was something deep inside a great mystery I had to discover. She was wise as angels are and said wherever I wondered over land and sea, these were the wanderings of a restless mind searching for peace with itself.
I looked at her and the love for her made me see that she was right, that what ever it was that I was looking for was in me and the search was not some far off land or Guru or a mystical power point in an exotic place, nor the solitude of the Himalaya's.
That night I turned on the little bedside side light I had installed just so I could look at her beauty before I slept. I gently kissed her lovely forehead, she sighed although in sleep.
I knew I would always be restless until I found that special peace and I knew that running away from her was running away from myself, I also knew that fear of commitment to our relationship would not now hamper my quest or search for freedom for that was in the space of my mind---not out there.
She awoke in the morning and kissed me and she knew I was home and with her. I was blessed with having a relationship with an angel and providence has been kind to me.
SHACK
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