To me being safe in a way is not being safe; what makes me feel safe is familiarity with the known; OK the known by familiar surroundings and yet these are temporarily comforting and then can be taken for granted.
There is another safe mode; that is disciplines and routines and these are facilities and prerequisites that give me a sense of being healthy, well being, safe, the known and secure, however they can have such a grip on me that not doing a certain routine such as juicing, meditation, Qi Gong, my laundry, these are my daily habits that dictate my safety and well being and protect me from danger, a danger out there lurking to swipe me in an unexpected moment. I relish and pride myself in breaking these routines on occasions and feel aren't I daring, brave and then I get recriminations and start to worry; will not juicing for a few days clog me up, cause impurities and bad health, not meditating will not bring peace and mind stuff will jam up my awareness, not doing qi gong will stifle chi circulation and I will be stiff and so on. These are a prerequisite to peace and prosperity. These become my reality and safe guard and if not adhered too something dreadful will ensue. This then gives life to the saboteur, a self inflicted threat engendered by by making the routine a habit and BEING like a judge, jury and God.
The strange thing is these routines, habits and being pedantic clog me up and stiffen, stifle me, because if not adhered too, I feel guilty and I have let myself image down, the image that is created by my concepts and beliefs and even the belief to be empty and aware without bias, so many subtle twists and turns, maize's, blind alleys and one way streets. So watch and even that a 'must' routine and reminder and another habit, the connivances, the subtle innuendoes and mind trickery and yes the Buddha knew so well. I am my own judge and jury.
So by my own hand and habits I form a false illusion of safety and reliance on routine and discipline as a safeguard and the punishment is executed for breaking GODS will for me, Actually my own God Idea. I TOTALLY miss the point; God created me with a blueprint and in the end I have to acknowledge that is my safety net and since God is an invisible entity to the human flesh being therefore I substitute this with routine and discipline which I can see and feel.
Yes I have been gifted with a body and have to be sensible to Earth and body ethics to keep it safe and healthy as possible but not to the extremes of fastidiousness and punctilios endeavour. I know from the past when illness and problems have arisen and I have let go and gone into the silence and quiet mind and trusted in the emptiness so to speak and the routines and so on have been laid aside I am looked after by something else other that the safety net of habit and routine. Mind stuff interferes with the true safety net as below.
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| Open Gear Like in the 'Nosy Parker' in article back, trust in the unknown |
brings in its own solution and yes some exercise, wise food and health regimes are required but not to be substituted by mind habit and false safety; I notice the tussle with myself that it feels like tacky sticky glue being pulled apart :-
and that I can't quite let go and I feel to join back to the old habits and routines.
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| OLD HOUSE JOURNAL |
and frustratingly knowing they are mind brain washed concepts and beliefs which have cheekily and insidiously usurped the real me and God as it were.
So watch, do not attempt to challenge and break these streaky bits of glue and merely let it be and observe the tussle and realise by just observing that the fabric of that seemingly gluey substance is what it is and let the attention and anxiety given to it is the energy that feeds the need, need is fed by attachment.
The safety net is filled and is needed to catch the habits and retain them, no net no habits accept a few to keep the body well and fed and the sense of well being.
SHACK
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