SHACK 913 OH DEAR

  

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There is a distinct difference in being arrogant, bullish and brazen than self, self love. Self love is a quiet 'confidence' based on a feeling of some sort of trust in one's abilities plus a sort of almost trust in the divinity of Life and its source.

I've often blamed God for not loving me or to being ignored by fate and left to 'hang out and dry' however on closer inspection and introspection I have found it is not God's fault.

Through seemingly inexplicable vicissitudes through the passages of life and its various incarnations, the seemingly fete du compli on the treadmill to be born into a family that is dysfunctional and for some reason one of the offspring cannot cope or seems to have inherited a 'lack of confidence' 'self defacing' and a sad lack of 'self esteem' then obviously that person feels unworthy and is astounded when recognised or rewarded.

So not feeling worthy of saving, loving or some have said 'they are a waste of space' they might project this onto God and not realising that are loved, or feel the love of God or another person, they unknowingly block the flow of love feeling they are unworthy off it. They are indeed cutting off the supply because they are fulfilling their mission in life 'the programme of unworthiness and self contempt at being so', this is their life's ambition to fulfil that which this deep embedded program, brain washing and behavioural inheritance has inculcated in them.  

This state of affairs carries on until death and the gladness of being at the hand and dictates of the saboteur and hating and yet loving it in some garbled way. Hating the suffering, yet loving the feeling of accomplishing the program. This love hate anomaly persists and of course the dichotomy causes confusion, loss of energy, mental aberrations and sometimes spectacular outbursts of anger because the underlying cause is not natural to the human psyche.

Is there a way out of this dilemma?; perhaps some counselling and psychotherapy may help, but I have found meditation, mindfulness, feedback through recording one's thoughts on a digital recorder and listening to the tone of one's voice, keeping a diary / journal and listening and looking in meditation in a non judgemental way to that which spontaneously arises in the witnessing non biased way to the presentations presented. The programme is a 'self perpetuating hierarchy' which fuels itself by its own sustainable energy drawn from the psyche and is a sort of independent entity and can be seen as the 'not me' in meditation.

One may have to experiment and be determined and not suppress the feelings of inadequacy and put downs by others and oneself and 'catch the triggers' to set off or be sabotaged by them, for indeed the saboteur is the 'deep embedded brain washed programme' instilled in the womb and at birth and from there on.

The uterus-al experience is received by the developing brain and senses as 'feelings' and verbosity is not recognised or understood. Later on the feelings are understood by demonstration of parents and peers and then words are associated with the feeling and of course repetitive which is inculcation and becomes etched, deeply ingrained and one takes this as the norm and reality.  

Sometimes a tragic event, a so called life shattering calamity can 'shake loose'  the shackles or deepen the woe. However the clarity in the mind once the tethers and ties are glimpsed at and eventually removed is worth the effort despite the seemingly odds at accomplishing the freedom so desired and sought after.

                                         SHACK

SHACK 912 WALK ON BY

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The impermanence of everything, the fleeting nuance of a bygone moment, a feeling, an inkling only to be lost in the nebulous cloudy misty,  filmy, diaphanous, translucent 'substance' a mystical plasma, the feel-able consciousness frustratingly intangible but very tangible to itself and beyond explanation of definition.  

Here the secret Universe arises in the mists of endless swirling spirals in the quantum anomaly arising like a breaching whale seemingly from the endless ocean depths to delight the onlooker and then slowly sink to beneath the waves and ocean. The Moon that arises, the Sun and and clouds all appearing and disappearing seemingly on some mystic journey only to conjure up the imagination as to where they may go and return and what they experience on their journey's.

 The conjuring trick, the hey presto, here now, bewildering and beguiling and no matter how much I endeavour to grasp this wonder, to captivate this in form and words, it slips to a memory and then this feeling subsides into the locker of bygone days and with age a sigh of bidding farewell and moving on to other delicacies. 

All of this coming and going reminds one of the true lesson of peace and happiness; to enjoy, accept and let go, for the very grasping can lead to concreting the experience and setting in stone only at some time this will erode, a monument in history, or a grave stone in some forgotten weed ridden entangled in undergrowth in a neglected shabby graveyard by a drab unkempt church with a sense of a lingering ghosts and foggy memories.

So let go and dance with the moving ever shifting sand dunes of time and realise that time is held by memory and they too fade into eternity and dissolve into the timeless stream and river of the Cosmic Drama in which one participates for a short while in this mortal coil and that too is fading as each day passes.

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SHACK 911 I KNOW

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Somewhere in the shadowy distant past all held in the loving mind and stored in magnetic spiralling energy fields, there is this glorious feeling that conjures up the vision of a distant 'me' lying on my back in the vastness of a scrub-land, interspersed with tufts of grass and sand and not far away a lush grass which lay in patches. As I gazed in rapture at the arch of the milky way and I felt I came from its centre not as a physical entity that my spirit was honed, burnished and brought to its purity by vast but gentle 'forces, energies' which furnished the seeds of creation and the Universe, no more can I say because it is too immense, overpowering and colossal.  

This feels to me like a physical heaven and somehow I came from there and will return there, not so much as a physical being but as an energy form, a spiritual essence.

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I feel I had an incarnation in Mongolia and Mongolia appeals to me and I often have feelings around the throat singing, the Yurts and Gers.

Anyway this feeling is always accompanied by a deep sigh and peace. It changes my whole mood and is often associated with UFO's which come from the black hole at the Milky way Centre and somehow play such an influence on our Galactic  evolution and our human consciousness.

The vastness of the heavens brings home to me the infinite eternal nothingness, not a feeling of being dwarfed and engulfed by this immensity but by a feeling of 'yes this is my destiny, to roam free amongst the stars, to navigate the Milky Way and other starry wonders, to one day go not in a cumbersome rocket or spaceship, not even in a UFO  although this at first and then into the infinite as a energy being free from fetters, chains, tethers or fleshly binds, this is my glorious dream and one I feel I came from and somehow landed up in this form I inhabit now.

So the plains and African and Australian deserts, the prairies, the vast open land spaces and vistas remind me of the wide never ending travels in Space I once as a spirit enjoyed.

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SHACK 910 QUICKEN

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Lovely older forms of expression like 'He Quickeneth the Spirit'. It has such an intrinsic feel for me. It seems to enliven and awaken and ancient, nay, beyond time, beyond mortality feel. It feels to me like the very essence and substance of my being, beyond times immemorial, even beyond the atom and its waves and particles, it rests in the arms and bowels and  the very womb of creation. 

To me 'HE' as above is symbolic, it could 'She' quickeneth or many other names; The Father, The Mother, HESHE, SHEHE, The Eternal One, Life, The Most High, The Beloved for me not a name of a being, this is far beyond the flesh.

For me I feel quickened when I am still, quiet and in empty mind and another quote 'He that waits upon the Lord' this means to me to be in silent meditation, just a quiet interested aware and alert observer, not requesting or expecting, not in any emotional state, just being, ticking over quietly and at peace with myself and waiting patiently and just feeling the quiet relaxing 'beingness of existence', just Life at the bedrock of Life at its potential without form or sound, the purring joy of just being here now in a moment of no moment, a flow without end or beginning.

Quite expectantly I feel a joy, an enlivening, not physical, but just a sharp alertness, a brightness, a clarity and a shining awareness without a thought to mar the pristine beauty of the light of wonder and creation. I can hardly contain the sheer upliftment and a sort of exuberance which is not buoyant or hilarious, vulgar or sentimental, it as if the heavens have opened and the locker of golden grace and blessings have emptied in a shower on me. The me being not the flesh body but a consciousness which is and has recognised its essence. 

I know not how to adequately express this feeling and actually what it means for any attempt to define, categorise, put a logical explanation to it would indeed destroy the feeling, box it, compartmentalise it, bring it to the academic boiler house and scientific analyses, like picking the bones clean after a sumptuous repast, nay leave the sleeping dog to be and dream its own dream.    

So what is the spirit and why should I like to call it Holy?; Well as I wait as above in a silent mode of consciousness it is true my body feels tingling and as I wait with non expectancy and sometimes in the slow movements of Qi Gong, washing up, a bus ride, doing absolutely anything and just not thinking, suddenly or a creeping unfolding movement of 'mind' this something arrives, not invited or thought about, it is a spontaneous intuitive event and is a wonderful surprise and gift and it seems to me a gift of grace and love. It is so overpoweringly wonderful that it feels divine and yes, Holy.

Now then what is this 'energy'; its electrical, well in the body it can be measured by various instruments, for instance a blood pressure monitor, EEG, SQUID, electroencephalographs and so on, but these are merely physical indications which alter in meditation, however the experience is not measurable and there are academic postulations that this experience is merely a psychosomatic response and reaction to deep relaxation. However with the same instruments of science mentioned above it has been shown how the energy of a healer and thought experiments can be seen across the globe and recorded. This to me shows that this experience is felt in the body as effect of the experience, however there is the separate energy that travels non locally with awareness as in astral travelling, NDE and other such like phenomena which to me prove that this energy as described above is indeed independent of the fleshly cocoon and chooses to temporarily sojourn in the cocoon for various reasons and at the beckoning of Life itself. 

Of course the encapsulated Life force in the cocoon may become so attached to the phenomenon of the cocoon that its forgets its origin in a way that is has been seduced by the cocoon and the realm and habitat of the cocoon and so on the demise of the mortal coil there is a tendency to miss its former habitat and so search for another fleshly habitat and so reincarnate. The magnetic pull as it were of Earthly indulgences lures the 'spirit' back to its former home.

 However there may arrive in one such inhabitant the notion that every visible phenomena in Earth and on it has a life expectancy and yes even the heavens, it is all impermanent and transient, this then can get the quest motivated as to 'who am I' and  am I just a temporary being always having to go round after round and then perhaps the notion pops up; perhaps when the lure, the glamour and seduction wears off there maybe another option. At first the thought of not returning to the known and familiar causes one some consternation and one may baulk at such a thing and seek a distraction or become distressed and depressed, however the brave explorer, the pioneer, the warrior of the hungry quest to find an everlasting 'me' not in the body but in the mind and not in a hell or heaven but in some other non corporeal form which eventually rots and decays and today in science looking at cyborgs human and machine joined, as immortality and programming the perfect life by algorithms and computers.

Is there a possibility that the awareness experienced as above can live on and be free and not need a corporeal form or any other form? I have a feeling that with continual 'enquiry' as in meditation one can realise and not be duped by science saying its not possible and so on, but trusting one's experience and the 'feel of the real' so to speak, mind you one can dupe oneself by allowing the ego which is the brainwashed self full of programmes, agendas brought about by years of inculcation and is very experienced at getting its own way by trickery, deceit, bribery and all else and keeping the awareness sharp and clear as above eventually breaking free not by force but by experience and gently going deeper into quietness which eventually frees oneself without suffering and force to be a 'free spirit' which does not need a form to live in. It lives as Life and is free of expression and attachment and yet is the essence of all and everything.

So what is the nature of the spirit?; As to that this is what you and I are without form, we are one Omniscient, Omnipotent, Omnipresent , there is only One of us, there is no duality and when you experience the 'holy spirit' above it is a common experience to all in the cocoon and it feels you as a separate being, yet on the release truly of the anchors, chains and magnetic pulls of the form of Earthly sojourn, one has not a double and is just the one and one and the all and all.

    SHACK

SHACK 909 CLEARING TO MAKE SPACE

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Unlearn is untangling oneself from the net of conditioning and the history therein. Unlearning assists in springing the trap of believing without questioning. 

The past conditioning was one's safety net, now one is cutting the the strands of the net and then there can be free fall and the fear of not having a safety net which although being trapped it never the less embraced one in a cold comfort sort of way and getting used to living with it. Now there is a freedom and the fear may leave a residue, this residue is hard and fast habits and getting used to the relative freedom is a relief from being imprisoned by the net of the past and as one gradually trusts the emptiness of freedom the fear of losing safety habits is overcome.

One then begins to trust the invisible supply chain and the realisation that the net of fear was the block and stumbling faltering trust that held up and stifled the supply of the infinite.

Zen story I often repeat; ' A monk on having satori went away from the monastery and to the mountains to have solitude and grow into his satori without distraction. He took some books and sourced his food from nature. His little wooden hut was small but sufficient. When the winter came the birds migrated, the leaves fell, the trees were bare and the snow fell hard and fast. He was warm and had a simple log fire. The spring came, the flowers came to bloom, the trees had leaves and the birds returned.

The monk looked out at all of this and said "all this and I did not do a thing to make it happen". 

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SHACK 908 LIVING MATERIALS

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In the UFO craft the materials are not like Earth human fashioned fabrics and metals. Even the Roswell crash UFO had fibre optics and had light emanating from their fractured ends even with no apparent source to light them. 

This is more evolved or advanced it is as if the materials were alive, organic as were the craft itself. This to me suggests that the light beings and the craft were one in organic alive forms, they were identical in substance, that is light, just that the light arrangement, atoms and particles took on different forms to human eyes and perception, the craft and UFOnaughts were and the same, imbued with the Life force, soul and spirit.

The appearance to the human perception would appear as being and a craft, however they were the one and the same. The Roswell material which some kept after the crash and hid away could not be severed and what ever shape bent too came back to the original shape, it was alive and intelligent yet without being seemingly damaged or felt pain.

So as they were alive and joined by a common factor and to me this was consciousness, even beyond the need for telepathy, it was if they were natural extensions of themselves. 

In fact one might say they were one and just a consciousness travelling through space. Does it indeed travel. Perhaps its consciousness projecting its mind intention or dream and is just that. Since we are all in the consciousness of the one life that pervades what is known as space and in fact there is no such thing as space it is all mind, consciousness and awareness. 

I have written in my POST Blogs in www.geofffreed.com about an incident that took place at Woodbridge RAF and American Airbase in Suffolk UK, and when the airman or soldier touched the hieroglyphics on the craft it felt tingly, buzz'y, a sort of aliveness  and he heard words and sentences inside his head so to speak. It seemed to communicate telepathically, it maybe as the material was alive and intelligent the hieroglyphics were able to broadcast by the activation of the touch of soldier that released emanations, vibrations and frequencies, which of course most humans do to touch.

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SHACK 907 PEARLS

                                                   William Meader
 

Behind every form is the light of Creation coming in waves of light behind every form that seems so solid and behind the forms are the shining atoms, the beautiful pearls which are said to be empty and  are full of energy which is the divine thought that moulds them, shapes them and coalesces them into the form of its desire.

Behind everything is the light, the light of creation and love which is in another dimension which is beyond the understanding of Hunan intelligence and understanding. It is beyond Alpha, Delta, Theta and Gamma frequencies and its frequency is finer and faster it is even faster than the speed of light which is comprehensible to the human mind. This is the light of Life manifesting itself in its various forms that surf the waves of light and is the salvation of humankind. Amen.

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