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The search for security in an identity is usually wrapped around a form which is perceived by human flesh senses. The unwrapping of the layers valiantly protecting its precious cargo, the form portrayed as layers and seemingly 'there' and tangible begins to become exposed and fragile as the layers of deception fall away or are peeled.
What seemed so impenetrable now seems more porous, flimsy and not having substance and this core which stood so proud or hid behind a fake fragility to lure the attention it desired to make it an acknowledgement a testimony of its existence or took all by the scruff of the neck, now seems a fading sunset, an autumn when the leaves of the programs, agendas and conditioning lose their efficiency and energy.
The core which was the fortress and seemed so unassailable now seems flaccid and weak, drooping and loss of vigour not only of body but of mind. Then on the final layer the core is exposed and what was the pinnacle of one's ambition and life's purpose lies exposed and the truth of its shallow programmes and brain washed underpinning where to be found as just that, a set of ideas and aspirations that now fall besides the roadside.
The disillusionment, the very acute disappointment can send one into deep despondency and depression and send one to a black hole that sucks one even deeper into doom and gloom and seemingly no escape. All those years of living a lie, someone else's highs and low's, now seen and felt as gibberish and then so real and true is felt and comprehended now as 'what a let down how could I have fallen for this and now I am in the pit of hopelessness where can I go now only further into the mire'.
Fortuitously from this seemingly hopeless position, spontaneously a light comes on and one may question; well if I was living someone else's dreams or dogmas and they were ideas, concepts, platforms of ideology and achievements and now seen to be but just that 'mind manufactured thoughts' built into sequential linear constructs which were the foundations, the very rocks and concrete of my reality and now just a crumbling old building with the foundations giving way and collapsing into rubble, now seen as beliefs built to be a reality as solid, lasting and the tantamount of my life and fulfilment, now empty and unfulfilled and crushed beneath the weight of the collapsing edifice.
Then this chink of light says 'well you know this is false and have seen the apparent reality as a sham, a mirage then who is this that is witnessing this, who is experiencing this when all has gone and only the debris is here and even that has disappeared, there is nowt to perceive, there is this 'emptiness' that I feared because I thought and was told I had to be a somebody even as a nobody I was a somebody, but being a 'real' as it were, a nobody' and apparently not having a form as such, still a tangible flesh cocoon yet an empty head / mind / consciousness / awareness and not senile and mumbling in a gibberish incoherent manner, a sort of an awareness of a 'me' not cloaked or wrapped, bound or solidified by mind concepts but just an awareness, clear bright, intelligent in an intuitive wise manner arriving and living from I know not where.
What seemed so impenetrable now seems more porous, flimsy and not having substance and this core which stood so proud or hid behind a fake fragility to lure the attention it desired to make it an acknowledgement a testimony of its existence or took all by the scruff of the neck, now seems a fading sunset, an autumn when the leaves of the programs, agendas and conditioning lose their efficiency and energy.
The core which was the fortress and seemed so unassailable now seems flaccid and weak, drooping and loss of vigour not only of body but of mind. Then on the final layer the core is exposed and what was the pinnacle of one's ambition and life's purpose lies exposed and the truth of its shallow programmes and brain washed underpinning where to be found as just that, a set of ideas and aspirations that now fall besides the roadside.
The disillusionment, the very acute disappointment can send one into deep despondency and depression and send one to a black hole that sucks one even deeper into doom and gloom and seemingly no escape. All those years of living a lie, someone else's highs and low's, now seen and felt as gibberish and then so real and true is felt and comprehended now as 'what a let down how could I have fallen for this and now I am in the pit of hopelessness where can I go now only further into the mire'.
Fortuitously from this seemingly hopeless position, spontaneously a light comes on and one may question; well if I was living someone else's dreams or dogmas and they were ideas, concepts, platforms of ideology and achievements and now seen to be but just that 'mind manufactured thoughts' built into sequential linear constructs which were the foundations, the very rocks and concrete of my reality and now just a crumbling old building with the foundations giving way and collapsing into rubble, now seen as beliefs built to be a reality as solid, lasting and the tantamount of my life and fulfilment, now empty and unfulfilled and crushed beneath the weight of the collapsing edifice.
Then this chink of light says 'well you know this is false and have seen the apparent reality as a sham, a mirage then who is this that is witnessing this, who is experiencing this when all has gone and only the debris is here and even that has disappeared, there is nowt to perceive, there is this 'emptiness' that I feared because I thought and was told I had to be a somebody even as a nobody I was a somebody, but being a 'real' as it were, a nobody' and apparently not having a form as such, still a tangible flesh cocoon yet an empty head / mind / consciousness / awareness and not senile and mumbling in a gibberish incoherent manner, a sort of an awareness of a 'me' not cloaked or wrapped, bound or solidified by mind concepts but just an awareness, clear bright, intelligent in an intuitive wise manner arriving and living from I know not where.
SHACK
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